Humour

You can’t fix stupid but you can ROFL at it

After a long, emotion-filled love/hate relationship with Facebook, during which time I maintained three different profiles, I stepped away from it all several months back. And, honestly, most of the time I don’t miss it at all. Sometimes, though, when in need of a good old laugh, I wish I could just log on and troll over to the local “buy and sell” network to which I used to belong.

It was a place, not only filled with many laugh-out loud posts, but also somewhere I could expand my grasp of the English language. Last year I posted these on one of my little-used blogs on another blogging platform. I’m sure they are worth a re-post.

Excuse me madam, but I think your son may have been abducted by aliens ...
Excuse me madam, but I think your son may have been abducted by aliens …
In South Africa we call Jeans "a jean-pant" so this made me really homesick for a moment with its "studio pant". GUC: German University in Cairo? Nope, that can't be it... Why not just say "Good Used Condition" ... It's not like she's paying per word to advertise here. Unless she meant "Growing Up Creepy" but that would just be weird...
In South Africa we call Jeans “a jean-pant” so this made me really homesick for a moment with its “studio pant”. GUC: German University in Cairo? Nope, that can’t be it… Why not just say “Good Used Condition” … It’s not like she’s paying per word to advertise here. Unless she meant “Growing Up Creepy” but that would just be weird…
How cool is that - a snowflake on the arm that changes colour to tell you if it's too cold! Or you could just look at the colour of the baby in the suit. Blue-tinged baby = too cold. Red, flushed baby = too warm.
How cool is that – a snowflake on the arm that changes colour to tell you if it’s too cold! Or you could just look at the colour of the baby in the suit. Blue-tinged baby = too cold. Red, flushed baby = too warm.
Sorry, but exactly what is that thing that you're trying to sell? Lindsay seems to know, but it's all still fuzzy to me.
Sorry, but exactly what is that thing that you’re trying to sell? Lindsay seems to know, but it’s all still fuzzy to me.
Of course, sticking to accepted conventions of good grammar and spelling is completely lost on most people here. I'm still trying to figure out why she bothered with the colon.
Of course, sticking to accepted conventions of good grammar and spelling is completely lost on most people here. I’m still trying to figure out why she bothered with the colon.
Online marketing tip number 1: highlight the pros of what you are trying to sell, for example "double bed ... has stain." Perhaps further enhance the selling point by describing how the stain was created, like "only one owner: incontinent grandma."
Online marketing tip number 1: highlight the pros of what you are trying to sell, for example, “double bed … has stain.” Perhaps further enhance the selling point by describing how the stain was created, like “only one owner: incontinent grandma.” Still available? I’m shocked.
I've never really understood the whole "need gone ASAP" which one sees on the site often. Surely if the owner is trying to sell it he or she wants it gone? But in this case, I have to agree. That thing is nightmare-inducing. Seriously, get it out of the house like yesterday already!
I’ve never really understood the whole “need gone ASAP” which one sees on the site often. Surely if the owner is trying to sell it he or she wants it gone? But in this case, I have to agree. That thing is nightmare-inducing. Seriously, get it out of the house like yesterday already!
"Gently used." I should hope so!
“Gently used.” I should hope so!

 

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “You can’t fix stupid but you can ROFL at it

  1. I love these…the funniest one I saw on facebook said, “looking for one night stand, maybe two”. I almost died laughing over that one!

I hope you enjoyed this post. Please leave a comment with your (relevant & reverent) thoughts.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s